BILL CLINTON SCARED LADY GAGA WAS GOING TO GIVE HIM A BONER
but then he looked at her.
Apparently Billy has this charity or some shit called The Difference which recently had its 10 year concert celebration. Huge stars came out and Gaga warned (seriously, she WARNED) Clinton that she was going to use the stage time to have her “Marilyn” moment.
I guess that means she’s referring to the whole Marilyn Monroe/JFK “happy birthday mr. president” thing. Hey didn’t they totally fuck? Lady Gaga, were you just telling Bill that you’re DTF? AWESOME!
So obviously, Bill was a little excited—i mean nervous…Seriously, if she showed up actually looking HOT like MARILYN MONROE and not GROSS like MARILYN MONROE’S CORPSE then Bill would have totally had a RAGING FIERY HARD-ON LIVE IN FRONT OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE and America would be the greatest country on earth again.
Video footage also shows Gaga is hella lip-syncing (which is no shocker) but near the end she is trying to have a fucking CONVERSATION with Bill in the middle of her song (she was singing Bad Romance by the way, and in the beginning changed it to BILL ROMANCE)
Best part: Her conversation consisted of telling him how hard it is to dance in her heels. Then she WALKS OFF AND NEARLY TRIPS ON HER HEELS!
Seriously she says to Bill, “It’s a good thing I used to dance on bars right?” (wtf?) Then she walks off and saves herself from what would have been a really bad trip. I tried capturing it, this is the closest i could get: 
original story link with the video: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/the-difference/bill-clinton-emotional-birthday-celebration-073622954.html
